by Shannon Tillman | Apr 23, 2026 | Bible Study, Theology, Thoughts
The moment probably replayed in his head. The segment in time had been divinely orchestrated to cut to the core of his soul. If it had been merely an acquaintance, the meeting would have been embarrassing, even painful. But this was his best friend. The agony of the encounter would never be forgotten. The event began in a moment of fear and confusion which led to hasty words.
Luke 22:54-57
Then seizing him, they led him away and took him into the house of the high priest. Peter followed at a distance. And when some there had kindled a fire in the middle of the courtyard and had sat down together, Peter sat down with them. A servant girl saw him seated there in the firelight. She looked closely at him and said, “This man was with him.” But he denied it. “Woman, I don’t know him,” he said.
Jesus had been arrested only a few hours earlier. Frightened, the disciples had all abandoned Him in the garden. Peter picked up small pieces of courage and decided to follow at a distance. This could be costly. As a follower of Jesus, he could be arrested and suffer the same fate. Peter took the risk and entered the courtyard of the high priest. He hoped to just mingle by the fire, not taking the risk of conversation. The servant girl’s accusation startled him. Peter answered with a denial of knowing Jesus. His heart surely pounded while the words tumbled out with fear. He thought the discussion would end there, but more followed.
Luke 22:58
A little later someone else saw him and said, “You also are one of them.” “Man, I am not!” Peter replied.
Imagine being pointed out again in a crowd that could easily turn hostile. He was in the courtyard of the high priest, the main orchestrator of the events leading to the arrest of Jesus. Peter was seated amongst temple workers who would willingly turn him in. Once again, Peter denied knowing Jesus. Peter, the one devoted to Jesus so much that he risked his life to be in the courtyard, proceeded to tell the people that he was not one of the followers of Jesus.
Peter’s denial took place outside in the courtyard. Inside the house, the terrible mistreatment of Jesus was underway.
Matthew 26:67-68
Then they spit in his face and struck him with their fists. Others slapped him and said, “Prophesy to us, Messiah. Who hit you?”
The angry religious leaders beat Jesus. Blood flowed from the cuts and bruises on His body, on His face. His clothes were stained with blood. There were many men in the room; they all seemed to want an opportunity to spit and hit Jesus. Their mocking words matched their abusive behavior. After brutalizing Jesus, He was tied up and led away to face another fake trial. The guards brought Him outside, where Peter was still waiting, where Peter faced another conversation.
Luke 22:59-61b
About an hour later another asserted, “Certainly this fellow was with him, for he is a Galilean.” Peter replied, “Man, I don’t know what you’re talking about!” Just as he was speaking, the rooster crowed. The Lord turned and looked straight at Peter.
The bloody, bruised face of Jesus looked at Peter. Jesus supernaturally knew that Peter was in the courtyard, for Peter had come after Jesus had been brought to trial. But Jesus knew where Peter was and what he had been doing, what he had been saying. In fact, Jesus had already told Peter what would happen hours earlier.
Luke 22:31-34
“Simon, Simon, Satan has asked to sift all of you as wheat. But I have prayed for you, Simon, that your faith may not fail. And when you have turned back, strengthen your brothers.” But he replied, “Lord, I am ready to go with you to prison and to death.” Jesus answered, “I tell you, Peter, before the rooster crows today, you will deny three times that you know me.”
Jesus knew before the denial happened and Jesus knew when the denial happened. God, in His sovereignty, allowed Jesus to walk by Peter at the exact moment of the third denial. Jesus did not say a word to the disciple, only looked at him. The face Peter had seen only hours earlier now had been marred by the brutal beating given by the religious leaders. The blood, the bruises, however, did not hide the eyes that looked straight at Peter.
Luke 22:61b-62
Then Peter remembered the word the Lord had spoken to him: “Before the rooster crows today, you will disown me three times.” And he went outside and wept bitterly.
Jesus looked at Peter; Peter’s eyes filled with tears. Jesus left for the next trial; Peter left for a solitary place to weep. Imagine the thoughts that raced through Peter’s head. He remembered the prophesy from Jesus earlier in the night, warning about the denials to come. Peter had foolishly responded that he would never deny Jesus, would even die for Jesus. Peter replayed the conversations from around the fire, the words of denial spoken aloud. Then, Peter, pictured again the beaten face of Jesus looking beyond the crowd, just to him. The pain, the shame overwhelmed Peter. His words felt like the end and he would have to live with the regret the rest of his life.
Three days later, another word was spoken to a group of women who came to the tomb of Jesus. The word was given to an angel who had a specific message for Peter.
Mark 16:6-7
“Don’t be alarmed,” he said. “You are looking for Jesus the Nazarene, who was crucified. He has risen! He is not here. See the place where they laid him. But go, tell his disciples and Peter, ‘He is going ahead of you into Galilee. There you will see him, just as he told you.’”
Notice the words: “and Peter”.
Peter may have denied Jesus, but Jesus did not deny Peter. No matter what Peter had done, he was still included in what Jesus had already planned to do. Peter saw the bruised face of Jesus, but then he heard the message of Jesus that he would see Him again. Jesus will not look as He did, for now He would be in His resurrected body. Peter will not speak like he did, for now he would encounter the resurrected Christ. Everything had changed.
Our past does not stop the Lord’s plan in and through us. Before we sin, God already knew what we would do. The calling on our lives remain the same. For another prophecy, besides the one about his denial, had been given to Peter. As Peter acknowledged Jesus as Messiah, Jesus acknowledged Peter as a future leader of the church.
Matthew 16:16-18
Simon Peter answered, “You are the Messiah, the Son of the living God.” Jesus replied, “Blessed are you, Simon son of Jonah, for this was not revealed to you by flesh and blood, but by my Father in heaven. And I tell you that you are Peter, and on this rock I will build my church, and the gates of Hades will not overcome it.
This prophecy began to be fulfilled on the day of Pentecost; following the death, resurrection, and ascension of Jesus to heaven. The one who denied Jesus in a small group, boldly preached to a large crowd.
Acts 2:14, 36, 41
Then Peter stood up with the Eleven, raised his voice and addressed the crowd: “Fellow Jews and all of you who live in Jerusalem, let me explain this to you; listen carefully to what I say… “Therefore let all Israel be assured of this: God has made this Jesus, whom you crucified, both Lord and Messiah.” Those who accepted his message were baptized, and about three thousand were added to their number that day.
Peter, the one who denied Jesus, became the bold proclaimer of Jesus, just as Jesus had prophesied. Jesus saw Peter in his failure, but He also saw Peter’s future success in serving God’s kingdom. Your past, whatever that piece of your life that you are so ashamed of, does not define your future ministry. The Lord saw your failure, the same failure He went to the cross for to provide forgiveness. Now, the resurrected Jesus reminds us of our call just as He reminded Peter of his call which remained intact even after the darkest moment of his life. Just like Jesus said, “…and Peter”, He also says our names, too. Everything has changed.
by Shannon Tillman | Apr 16, 2026 | Blog, Theology, Thoughts
As soon as I saw the name of the road, I knew I could never live in a house on that street. The street’s name was the same one from a painful relationship in the past. As soon as I saw the name, floods of negative memories filled my mind. Just the name was enough to ruin my day. While that name conjured up bad emotions, there are other names I hear that bring a smile. The name is attached to a person, to a relationship, to a trust that never wavered. A name can remind us of faithful friendships or unfaithful choices. There is power in the memories associated with a name.
Psalm 9:10
Those who know your name trust in you, for you, Lord, have never forsaken those who seek you.
The words convicted me as I read them, for I realized that I fail to believe these words. There are areas in my life where I do not fully trust the Lord, but there are other areas where my confidence seems complete. Where my trust breaks down is the evidence of a lack of knowing a certain name or aspect of the Lord.
The names of God reveal His attributes. The Lord is too massive to be described in only one way. Thus, the many names revealed in the Word of God show us His character. Some of the names are more familiar than others: Lord, Provider, Comforter, Shepherd, Creator, and so much more. He is the perfection of every good attribute, mighty and tender, holy and merciful, set apart and near. He is truly wonderful.
And yet, I doubt. There are times I struggle. The lack of faith points to what I do not know about God. For example, I wrestle with His timing in answering prayer. Why not today? Why the delay? My questions point to the part of God I do not trust: El Elyon, the Most High God. He is above time, above the situations, above my opinions. He is orchestrating events around the world, surely He can see and handle my problems. But I hurt. And I do not know if He will ever answer, if He cares, if He sees me. I do not know, really know by experience, El Elyon.
I do know Him, however, as Jehovah Jireh, the Providing God. I have seen Him work financial miracles in my life. I trust Him, I know His name, I stand firm in what has been revealed, what I have experienced. I have sought Him, as the Psalmist wrote, and the Lord did not forsake me.
Today, I recommend a heart evaluation. Where do you trust God, where have you experienced Him, where do you know His Name? Celebrate that relationship you have with the divine. Consider as well the areas of struggle and doubt. What name of God have you not yet experienced? Press in there, just as I did this week. I know we will learn His Name in that area as well. He will not forsake us. We can trust Him. We can know His Name. When we hear His Name, we will smile as one who knows.
by Shannon Tillman | Apr 9, 2026 | Bible Study, Blog, Thoughts
I remember the teacher handed me back my high school science report. My grade was low. I saw that he wrote something on the top page about “referencing a project that I did not have.” I was thoroughly confused. My project had been turned in as well. I approached my teacher after class. I took him to my project that was placed under the table with some of the other students’ experiments. He apologized; he had completely missed it. The next day I received a corrected paper with my grade, the highest of all the students. That meant I could go to the county science fair (which seemed thrilling at the time). But my hopes were dashed because the teacher said, “I know the highest grade goes. However, Jana had the highest grade before I realized that I had missed your project under the table. She is so excited. I don’t want to take that from her. I’m sorry.” Sorry? What about me? I worked hard and now I cannot advance to the next level of science because the teacher was more sensitive to Jana’s feelings than mine?
I was devastated. However, I never told anyone in order to protect Jana and her journey. I remember I prayed and I felt that God let me know that Jana needed this and I did not. It was something for her. Maybe she ended up pursuing a science degree. I do not know; all I know is that something that was bad for me was good for her. God alone knows the reason why.
The same concept is true in a story about a captured slave girl who ministered out of her difficult situation to the very man who enslaved her.
2 Kings 5:1
Now Naaman was commander of the army of the king of Aram. He was a great man in the sight of his master and highly regarded, because through him the Lord had given victory to Aram. He was a valiant soldier, but he had leprosy.
Aram was an enemy nation of Israel. Naaman was the commander of this nation. His military success against Israel led to not only some people being killed but others being forced into slavery, never seeing their homeland again. One of these captured slaves was a young girl.
2 Kings 5:2
Now bands of raiders from Aram had gone out and had taken captive a young girl from Israel, and she served Naaman’s wife.
This girl could have chosen to resent her new masters. She could have mocked Naaman’s disease and thought it was a sign of judgment from God. She could have kept silent and not shared what she knew would help him. Instead, she chose to be kind, even to her enemy, and shared a source of healing for him.
2 Kings 5:3
She said to her mistress, “If only my master would see the prophet who is in Samaria! He would cure him of his leprosy.”
This young girl had faith. She believed for a healing of leprosy! She wanted her enemy to be delivered from his suffering. This girl would not have known about Naaman’s leprosy except for the fact that she had been taken captive and brought to serve his wife in their home. Her bad situation was setting up for his good. Upon hearing the news of a potential healing, Naaman chose to go see the prophet, Elisha. Naaman eventually obeyed the command of Elisha to dip in the Jordan river.
2 Kings 5:14
So he went down and dipped himself in the Jordan seven times, as the man of God had told him, and his flesh was restored and became clean like that of a young boy.
Naaman was healed, his skin fully restored. More importantly, his physical healing led to a greater spiritually awakening.
2 Kings 5:15a, 17b
Then Naaman and all his attendants went back to the man of God. He stood before him and said, “Now I know that there is no God in all the world except in Israel. ..please let me, your servant, be given as much earth as a pair of mules can carry, for your servant will never again make burnt offerings and sacrifices to any other god but the Lord.
Naaman, a pagan worshipper, became a follower of the one true God. The misfortune, the pain of a young servant girl was being orchestrated into a story to bring an Aram commander to salvation. Her bad situation would lead to Naaman’s good.
Sometimes, the difficulties we face are what brings others to the Lord. I used a silly example about the science project, but there have been other more painful circumstances that have been used for the transformation of others. Often in teaching, I give first hand accounts of difficulties I experienced in order to encourage others in their journey. That is working our pain for the good of others. The young girl’s temporary bondage led to Naaman’s eternal deliverance. Whatever hardship we are in, God will take it and bring eternal good out of it. We can trust Him even when it does not make sense. Sometimes we may not know the outcome, but we can trust that God will work it for good.
Romans 8:28
And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.
Only God knows how many people’s lives have been touched by Naaman’s story over the past 3000 years. His story only became eternal when one young girl’s misery became a ministry, even to her enemies. Our bad will be turned to good and the lives of others will be changed.
by Kevin Tillman | Apr 2, 2026 | Blog, Thoughts
It felt like it was over. Not loud. Not dramatic. Just that quiet kind of weight where you already know how the story ends. They had seen the crowds… They had heard the shouting… They had watched Him ride into the city like something big was finally happening…. They had been waiting on this moment for what seemed like forever.
And then it just… started slipping. What they thought would happen, wasn’t happening. Their expectations were crushed. By Friday, whatever hope they were holding onto was hanging on a cross. By Saturday… it was gone.
We skip that part pretty fast, because we know what’s coming. They didn’t. To them, this wasn’t leading anywhere. It wasn’t building toward anything. It was over.
What’s interesting is how quickly it turned.
Just a few days earlier, people were all in. They were lining the streets, celebrating, convinced that this was it. This was everything they’d been waiting for. Finally, the long awaited King was going to make everything right. They had expectations, but they were seeing it through their own lens. They had a version of how this was supposed to go. What kind of King He would be and what He would fix first.
But Jesus didn’t move that way. Not because He couldn’t… but because He wasn’t doing what they thought He should be doing. And once that started to become clear, things felt off. Expectations weren’t being met, and frustrations were rising.
You ever had that moment? Where something you were sure about… starts to not look the way you thought it would? That’s exactly where they were.
As the week progressed, it became more and more obvious that the way Jesus was dealing with things, was not the way they had hoped. More tension. More resistance. Conversations that didn’t settle anything, just stirred more and more questions. You can almost feel it building underneath everything. This isn’t going how they thought it would go.
And then Friday shows up and removes any doubt. This is done. All of the years of hoping that this Jesus was the answer were now dead and buried. There’s nothing hopeful about a cross. Nothing that suggests things are about to turn around. It looks final… because it is final. At least from where they were standing.
And then Saturday. Honestly, Saturday might be the hardest part. Because absolutely nothing happens. No explanation. No movement. Just time to sit in it.
That kind of silence can mess with you. You start replaying everything, trying to figure out where it went wrong. What you missed. You start thinking, “Maybe I misunderstood, or maybe this wasn’t what I thought. I thought I knew, but I guess I was wrong.”
We know that space so well. When nothing’s changing and you’re just… there with it…. stuck!
But then Sunday came…
There was no announcement. There was no warning. There was no dramatic music playing in the background.
Just an ordinary day. Just a couple of women walking toward a tomb, dealing with a loss and living in grief. But, as they approached… Something was off. Things didn’t seem right. The stone’s not where it should be. The tomb… empty. Then a few short words, “He is not here.” That’s it.
A short and simple message. But it changed everything, because what they thought was the end… wasn’t. It just looked like it.
And that’s where this stops being their story and starts hitting a little closer to home for us. We still do the same thing today. We have those moments that feel final and we call them finished. Things fall apart. Plans don’t work. Doors close. Prayers don’t get answered the way we thought they would. And, without even saying it out loud, we start to settle into it. We just accept things the way they are.
Our mantra becomes, “I guess this is just how it is.” But the resurrection doesn’t let you stay there. It doesn’t always explain everything. It doesn’t always fix things the way you’d want. But it does remind you of this… Just because it looks like the end… doesn’t mean God is done.
They thought it was over. They weren’t even close. Maybe there’s something in your life right now that feels just as settled. Like there’s no coming back from it. But God has a way of working in places that feel sealed off to us. The tomb looked final too.
It looked like the end… until it wasn’t!
by Shannon Tillman | Mar 26, 2026 | Bible Study, Blog, Thoughts
She was a master manipulator. Others regarded her as sweet and charming, but there was venom hidden underneath. Unfortunately, I was already entangled in friendship and in ministry when I began to notice the red flags. It was too late. The ministry I dreamed of ended up being harmed by her treachery. I had to shut the doors on what I believed I had been called to do.
In the midst of the pain, I questioned the Lord. Through the healing process I learned that the Lord had allowed an enemy to teach me. I ignored warning signs and proceeded ahead, causing devastation that could have easily been avoided. Now I have learned the difficult lesson which will protect myself and others in future ministry and life endeavors.
The Lord allows the enemy to win in the short term to teach His children a lesson for life.
2 Kings 5:1
Now Naaman was commander of the army of the king of Aram. He was a great man in the sight of his master and highly regarded, because through him the Lord had given victory to Aram.
The nation of Aram was an enemy of Israel. Naaman, Aram’s commander, was in charge of military raids against the Hebrew people. There were citizens killed, others taken as slaves, people robbed, and families torn apart. Yet, it was the Lord who was giving victory to Aram over His people of Israel. God allowed the enemy to win! Why? Because of the idolatry in the land.
2 Kings 3:1-3
Joram son of Ahab became king of Israel in Samaria in the eighteenth year of Jehoshaphat king of Judah, and he reigned twelve years. He did evil in the eyes of the Lord, but not as his father and mother had done. He got rid of the sacred stone of Baal that his father had made. Nevertheless he clung to the sins of Jeroboam son of Nebat, which he had caused Israel to commit; he did not turn away from them.
Joram was king of Israel at this time. His father was Ahab, meaning his mother was Jezebel. They are regarded as the most wicked king and queen in Israel’s history. Joram took after his parents, just not as evil, but still evil. This caused the nation to continue in idolatry. Thus, Aram was allowed to have victory battles over Israel. There was a divine purpose behind the pain. The intention was to sound an alarm to the hearts of the people, to draw them away from their idols, to repent before God, and seek His help. The Lord’s allowance of the enemy’s victory was to lead the nation back to God.
The Lord uses this strategy in our lives as well. God allows us to see the futility of our ways in order for us to learn to choose His ways. He will allow us to experience consequences in order to help us to want to repent. He will allow failures in order to teach us better choices. The Lord does all of this out of His love for us.
Hebrews 12:5-6
And have you completely forgotten this word of encouragement that addresses you as a father addresses his son? It says,“My son, do not make light of the Lord’s discipline, and do not lose heart when he rebukes you, because the Lord disciplines the one he loves, and he chastens everyone he accepts as his son.”
The Lord is our Father. His discipline, even allowing the enemy to temporarily win, is to teach us, to grow us, to change us. His discipline proves His love toward us.
Hebrews 12:7-8, 11
Endure hardship as discipline; God is treating you as his children. For what children are not disciplined by their father? If you are not disciplined—and everyone undergoes discipline—then you are not legitimate, not true sons and daughters at all… No discipline seems pleasant at the time, but painful. Later on, however, it produces a harvest of righteousness and peace for those who have been trained by it.
True sons and daughters, what discipline are you experiencing right now? Do not shun it! Instead, learn what your Father is teaching you. Are there idols you are turning to instead of Him? Lay the idols down. Are there repeat patterns that keep surfacing? Acknowledge the sin and repent. Out of love, the Father allows these circumstances to help you release what is not good and to embrace Him alone. God allows the enemy short-term wins in order for His children to have long-term, life-changing results. That is the Father’s love toward us.
by Shannon Tillman | Mar 19, 2026 | Bible Study, Blog, Thoughts
The list for prayer given to the prayer team has a multitude of requests for the physical body. From small ailments to surgeries to disease, there are precious petitions for healing. However, I have yet to see a prayer request to cure chronic sin although there is a verse in Scripture which shows the need for this type of healing as well.
Jeremiah 3:22a
“Return, faithless people; I will cure you of backsliding.”
Another Bible version states the verse in this manner:
“Return, O faithless sons, I will heal your faithlessness.”
The Lord is speaking to the nation of Israel. He wants to cure them of backsliding into sin, to heal them from their unfaithfulness. In essence, God does not just want the sin removed from our lives; He wants the root of the sin to be dealt with so that we are not prone to fall for the temptation again. How are we healed of faithlessness, of backsliding? A process of healing takes place when we deal with the reason why we choose the sin over God’s ways. The sin is the evidence pointing to a deep soul wound which chooses to salve itself temporarily with the false comfort of sin. The sin cycle keeps us from transformation and wholeness.
My heart’s cry is: Oh, God, heal me! I am faithless in my mind, wasting time replaying conversations or rewriting conversations in the way I wish they would have gone. I am faithless in avoiding difficult situations by going on my phone instead of choosing to pray. I am faithless in my frustration with God, wondering why my family’s lives are a mess and He has not intervened. I am faithless in carrying out the dreams in my heart because I live in crisis mode instead of a state of planning and preparing.
These are where I am faithless right now. I am sure more will be revealed in time. My list was even longer in the past as I had to work through pain from childhood. I can look at this list and still see trauma’s fingerprints on it. I so desire to please others that I want to say the right thing because I never felt like I pleased my family growing up. I go on my phone now, but as a child I would zone into a book pretending that I did not hear the argument taking place in another room. My frustration with God stems from years of unanswered prayers, causing me to believe the lie that I am forgotten or abandoned. I live in crisis mode because that is how I grew up and even though I hate it, sometimes it feels more comfortable.
Why am I sharing this? Because I want you to put in your area of unfaithfulness, your place of backsliding. Ask the Lord to show you why this is your area of struggle, the place of failure. The Lord knows the “why” behind your actions. Ask Him to heal the wound! God knows the misguided reasons we choose to sin. He understands. However, He does not excuse our behavior but gives us the promise for transformation.
The Lord promises to heal us of unfaithfulness. What a wonderful promise! God will heal us. All we have to do is come to Him.
Jeremiah 3:22b
“Behold, we come to You; For You are the LORD our God.”
How are we healed? First, we must acknowledge the area of backsliding. Next, we have to look to God instead of our sin. Then, we come to God. That means we no longer pretend the sin is not there, or no longer excuse our behavior, or no longer say it is “not that bad”. We do not have to try to clean ourselves up before coming. Instead, we come in the middle of the mess we are in. We look for God and recognize that He alone can help us change.
The Lord can transform us as His names in this verse reveal. We come to the LORD, Yahweh or Yehovah, which is the covenant name of God. In other words, we come to the One who we are in relationship with, the One who loves us. The Lord is God, which in Hebrew is “Elohim”, meaning the supreme God. We are coming to the One who is over our lives, the One in charge. He directs us into new paths, new responses, new ways of living. His names show His power and ability to save us from our unfaithfulness. With His love and power, He leads us into new life as He heals our backsliding. All we have to do is come.
Yes, Lord, heal us of our backsliding! This is our prayer request, one that You desire to readily answer in all of our lives.
