When my grandmother progressed further into dementia, I noticed that she would change details of her life story to make herself sound better. It was almost as if she could not face mistakes from her past so she would twist the story with a new ending to feel better about previous choices.
It is not only dementia that causes these “changing stories”. Sometimes, we can look at situations and rewrite them to justify ourselves to not face the full weight of wrongs we have committed. Aaron experienced this first hand in dealing with the golden calf.
Exodus 32:1-4
When the people saw that Moses was so long in coming down from the mountain, they gathered around Aaron and said, “Come, make us gods who will go before us. As for this fellow Moses who brought us up out of Egypt, we don’t know what has happened to him.”
Aaron answered them, “Take off the gold earrings that your wives, your sons and your daughters are wearing, and bring them to me.” So all the people took off their earrings and brought them to Aaron. He took what they handed him and made it into an idol cast in the shape of a calf, fashioning it with a tool. Then they said, “These are your gods, Israel, who brought you up out of Egypt.”
Aaron made an idol. He used a tool to create it. However, when Moses came down from the mountain, Aaron had a different story.
Exodus 32:21-24
He said to Aaron, “What did these people do to you, that you led them into such great sin?”
“Do not be angry, my lord,” Aaron answered. “You know how prone these people are to evil. They said to me, ‘Make us gods who will go before us. As for this fellow Moses who brought us up out of Egypt, we don’t know what has happened to him.’ So I told them, ‘Whoever has any gold jewelry, take it off.’ Then they gave me the gold, and I threw it into the fire, and out came this calf!”
The calf somehow became magical when Aaron told the story. The little cow formed itself in the fire and jumped out when it was done. The fact that Aaron had fashioned it with a tool was conveniently left out in the retelling to Moses.
How often do we leave out parts of our story to make ourselves look better? When we are caught in sin, why do we justify ourselves and try to not make ourselves sound “so bad”? The truth is, we do not see our sin from God’s perspective. Aaron had no idea how the Lord felt about what He had done. Moses knew, for God had told him earlier on the mountain:
Exodus 32:9-10
“I have seen these people,” the Lord said to Moses, “and they are a stiff-necked people. Now leave me alone so that my anger may burn against them and that I may destroy them. Then I will make you into a great nation.”
Only the intercession of Moses kept Aaron and the nation from being destroyed. Aaron did not understand the seriousness of his crime, of his sin. The same is true with us. Often, we like Aaron, compare ourselves to the people as we read earlier in verse 22:
Exodus 32:22
“Do not be angry, my lord,” Aaron answered. “You know how prone these people are to evil.
The people are prone to evil, but Aaron did not say how he was prone to sin as well. The people wanted an idol; Aaron wanted to please the people. Both sins were worthy of destruction. Aaron thought he had just left out the detail of a fashioning tool. In truth, he left out the fact that he had sinned against a holy God. Aaron looked at the people and thought he had done better than them. He did not look at the God who had the right to punish him for his sins.
Exodus 32:35
And the Lord struck the people with a plague because of what they did with the calf Aaron had made.
The Lord knew it was the calf Aaron had made. There was no magical cow jumping out of the fire. Instead, it was pieces of gold fashioned into an idol. The attempts to change the story between Aaron and Moses could not be rewritten between Aaron and the Lord.
It is time to stop excusing sin, or making ourselves feel better by twisting the story to justify ourselves. When we do wrong, we need to confess the sin to the Lord as well as to those we have harmed by what we have done. The Lord already knows the truth about the details we attempt to leave out or rewrite. But God can help us to write new stories with better endings when we choose to learn from what we have done instead of minimizing it. Aaron never made another idol for the people. Instead, he was chosen by God to be the High Priest for the nation. That is a much better story ending, with no need for a rewrite.