by Kevin Tillman | Aug 14, 2023 | Church Leadership
“We must have a reformation within the Church. To beg for a flood of blessing to come upon a backslidden and disobedient Church is to waste time and effort. A new wave of religious interest will do no more than add numbers to churches that have no intention to own the Lordship of Jesus and come under obedience to His commandments. God is not interested in increased church attendance unless those who attend amend their ways and begin to live holy lives.”
A.W. Tozer
I’ve seen it many times, you likely have as well. A new fervor develops in a congregation. Rapid numeric growth occurs. The people are happy, the staff is ecstatic, and God is said to be “moving”. But, what if it’s not God at all? What if it’s simply a “feel good” convention? Not to seem like an amateur psychologist here, but there is such a thing as group think. If enough people start moving in one direction and everyone thinks it’s good, well it’s good. In this Tozer quote he says “they have no intention to come under the Lordship of Jesus.” That is scary stuff. I mean, isn’t that truly the reason for all of it? That’s the bottom line right? That’s why we exist as a congregation in the first place.
As a life long minister, I understand the pressure of growth. I’ve been a part of a congregation that grew rapidly, and it was awesome. There really is nothing better than that feeling. It gives a sense of validation to us. However, I’ve also been in a congregation that was going through a rapid decline. I swear if I ever write a book it will be titled “How to Grow Your Youth Group from 120 to 60 and Keep Your Job”. Been there and done that! But, as good as the feeling of growth feels, and as hard as the time of decline feels, we should never soften the message simply to make it more palatable. Once again, isn’t Lordship the goal?
I do need to add a quick disclaimer here. Everyone will read these words through their own context, experience, and background. As I’ve heard said, “don’t hear what I’m not saying”. What I’m not saying is that rapid growth is always wrong. By no means is that correct. The great awakenings and the great revivals say otherwise. We see God’s Spirit moving mightily even today all over the world. I’m also not saying that churches cannot be “out of the box” and do some very creative things in the community. We SHOULD be in the community. We SHOULD be friends with the unchurched. But, we should never water the message down to the point where it’s no longer the gospel message.
by Kevin Tillman | May 22, 2023 | Church Leadership
“I want to find a church that loves me for who I am.”
“I’m looking for a place that won’t judge me.”
“I need a church that will love me and my family and help us feel appreciated.”
There is really nothing inherently wrong with the above statements. One might notice the focus on self. The quick answer is to tell someone to look for a place they can serve, and not just a place that serves them. That sounds good, and it is correct, but we have to be honest, we do live in an individualistic society. Whether we admit it or not, we all desire to be in a church where we belong, where we feel appreciated, and that loves us.
But, as church leaders, how far do we take this? Are we to offer the best user experience we possibly can? Well, yes, we should … But, I ask again, how far do we take this? What if the “who I am” of the person is completely contrary to God’s Word? What if the person needs judging? (And yes, we are CALLED to judge other believers … another blog, another day). What if the family is in complete shambles and needs help?
I’ve battled internally the role of my own shepherding over the years. My core personality is a people-pleaser. I want others to be happy, and if I’m honest, I want them to be happy with me. No one likes to be disliked. But, if you’ve been in ministry anytime at all, you know this is not reality. We live in a fallen world, and disagreements and misunderstandings happen. People are not always going to approve of me (or you). If you find yourself in a situation where everyone is agreeing with you, it might be time to question your leadership. That sounds harsh right? Sure we can get more agreement if we stay in the middle of the road. You know, don’t take too many hard stands, and if you do, make sure it’s an echo chamber stand. It’s easy to get an “amen” when you know that 99% of the people agree with you! We can get everyone to like us if we are always agreeable with everything, no matter what. But, that’s not authentic, and it’s not our calling … We are shepherds, and shepherds lead.
Taking a stand is tough. Doing the right thing is tough. What about the church member that is privately living in sin? I say privately, because if it’s public, it’s not as difficult to confront. But what if it’s private? What if you are called to talk to that church member privately? Your desire is truly to help and to restore. But, you are risking a lot by confronting. They can respond harshly. They can spread gossip. Meanwhile, you remain silent to the rest of the congregation out of respect for the person. What about the church member that is in a bad relationship? What about the ones that are harming themselves? Shepherding a flock is not easy if it’s done the right way.
Church leaders, it’s time we regain the boldness to which God called us. I’m not saying we go through the congregation slaying everyone over every sin and every issue. My people-pleasing personality would revolt against that anyway. But, I do believe we should be reminded that “our battle is not against flesh and blood”. I’ve been reminded this past week on several occasions that there is a very real spirit realm. As we “confront” people we are actually confronting “the powers of this dark world and against spiritual forces of evil”. We have members that are in bondage.
One word of caution: We have to make sure that we are ready spiritually ourselves! As we confront issues, attacks are sure to happen. There will be backlash from others, there will be misunderstanding. You might even risk your job. But, aren’t we called to be Christ’s representatives? Isn’t that what our calling is all about?
As I look ahead at my future days in ministry, I want to be a warrior that fights the dark forces. I would much rather be misunderstood and even disliked on earth, than to spend eternity not making a difference. I feel like I need to state an obvious here: I’m not saying we all need to be butt-heads and walk through our congregations being a human wrecking ball. We need to be agreeable and likeable people. We need to open our hearts and arms to everyone. But, we also need to be bold enough to call out sin when it’s there. We need to dig underneath the surface talk and provide honesty in situations.
True love doesn’t always agree. True love sometimes hurts. It hurts others, and it might even hurt us. But, truth heals.
My prayer: God help us to be “truth in love” people. I pray especially for younger ministers that are just starting. Help them be bold. God I pray for healing for our people. We live in dark times. Warfare is all around us. Families are being destroyed, addictions are at an all time high. We are more connected, yet less connected than ever. Help our churches to be more than just a gathering to help us feel better. I pray that our congregations become life-giving. Root out the deepest issues in us, your leaders first. Help us to become the warriors that you called us to be. Help us to know when to speak up, and when to be silent, when to confront, and when to console. We need Your wisdom, Your help, and Your power. Help us Lord … Amen!
by Kevin Tillman | May 1, 2023 | Church Leadership
It started with the best of intentions. Authenticity. The mantra in many of our congregations has became “be who you are”. On many occasions I have have even publicly said, “If you think the church is full of hypocrites, you are correct, I am one myself.” The intention was noble on my part. We don’t want to portray ourselves as something we aren’t. We don’t want to pretend to be someone we are not. That’s all good right? Well, yes it is. However, maybe this pendulum has swung a little too far. I believe we might have elevated authenticity to the level of a virtue. It’s not a virtue, although I guess one could compare it to being honest or truthful. For comparison sake, let’s say that authenticity is being honest with your life. That sounds so good and right. But, what if the truthful life we are living is contrary to God’s Word? What if we are authentically living a life that is contrary to God’s standard? Over the last several years, I have heard more and more, “at least I’m not fake”, or “I am the same person all the time”. The basic premise behind the statements are an acceptance of a sinful behavior, but justifying it because it’s not done privately. Once again, on the surface these sound right. But, what if we are allowing each other to live a lower standard simply because we are doing it authentically? Aren’t we called to “iron sharpens iron” each other? Aren’t we called to be fruit inspectors? Aren’t we called personally to become more like Christ? The answer to those last three questions is an emphatic “YES”.
Here’s an idea going forward: Let’s continue to be authentic with each other. But, let’s not make that the top priority. Let’s admit that we have sinfulness in our lives that needs to be brought under Lordship. Someone can authentically be a jerk, but that still doesn’t justify the behavior. I’d say to that person, “Thanks for being who you are, and not being fake, but the “who you are” is not acceptable”. The top priority is not authenticity, but rather becoming more like Christ.
God help us to not be fake, but at the same time grow. Help us to never accept a lowered standard simply because it fits “who we are”. God help us own “who we are” in our successes and our failures. Help us to be most authentic in our fight for Holiness.
